It Starts with Him!

Lately I have been thinking a lot about my life and what I am about. For a long time I have just existed, never really fulfilling the call that God has placed on my life. Honestly, I have never really known what that was, or at least never searched to figure it out. I have such a desire to have a purpose and vision in life, something to accomplish. The last few years I have had an inward struggle with what I like to do, what I am interested in and what I am passionate about. So I started trying to get everything organized, my finances, my home, my car, my never ending TODO list, the way I train up my children, etc. I have tried to put a method to my madness and while seeming at times to accomplish so much and get it all together, it all spirals out of control again...dirty house, filthy car, crazy kids ;) off budget. The the other day I was laying in bed thinking....I was thinking about how long it had been since I had truely been in the Word of God, not just opened it because I was supposed to, how long it had been since I truely prayed, not just night time prayers and meal prayers, but truely intercessed on behalf my children, friends and family or truely sat in awe of my Creator and then I thought of how long it had been since I had read the Bible to my children and my heart broke. God said "Callie, it starts with Me, everything will continue to spiral out of control, you will always feel like you are going in circles, until you organize your life with Me." I have tried to get it all right and when I feel like its all "right", then spend time with my Lord. I have had it all wrong. I must START with my relationship with Him, deepen it and grow my children up in Him and then all these things will be added unto me. Matthew 6:33. He is revealing His purpose for me. The more I focus on Him, the clearer my gifts and passions become! This is a journey, I just have to get outside of myself and my desires and make my world HIS world. Its time for me to START with Him!!!